My fascination with love stories, courtship, and the intricate dance of romance started long before I could even understand what these concepts truly meant. You see, ever since I was a toddler, my parents filled our home with the love songs of their youth. It was like a never-ending playlist of their favourite tracks, playing softly in the background as I toddled around, barely able to speak. This early and constant exposure to love songs made me vulnerable to their allure, even though I was too young to grasp their full meaning.
There's nothing inherently wrong with being exposed to such music, but it doesn't necessarily mean it's the right thing to do, either. For me, these love songs became a sort of inheritance from my parents. I consider myself the preserver and self-proclaimed archivist of these old tunes, treasuring them as if they were family heirlooms. They hold a special place in my heart and have shaped much of who I am today. They have become a soundtrack to my life, each one carrying memories and emotions that resonate deeply within me.
These songs didn't just stay in the background of my life; they seeped into my very being and influenced my creative endeavours. My artworks, whether visual or literary, often revolve around themes of romantic love, most of them resembling storybook romances. This influence can be seen in my favourite activities during my youth, such as attending ballroom promenades and learning ballroom dancing. I always held onto the hope that I would find my true love at one of these events, just like in the fairy tales I cherished.
However, as an autistic individual, I find myself grappling with the complexities of relationships and marriage. I'm not quite ready for such commitments, as I am still learning to maintain stability and independence. Having graduated just last year, I am taking my first steps into bachelorhood, which feels like the early stages of adulthood. The world seems to be growing more chaotic, and with the looming spectre of the Great Tribulation, the chances of finding a life partner seem increasingly slim.
I acknowledge that there are blessings in both singlehood and marriage. For those who are single, I advise them to enjoy this period to the fullest. There are unique experiences and freedoms that single life offers, which married couples might not be able to enjoy. However, I must admit that there are moments when loneliness creeps in, and the chances of living alone like a hermit become is increasing. However, I remind myself that this is just a phase and that I am capable of finding fulfilment and happiness on my own.
The pressure from society to get married can be overwhelming. Those who try to persuade singles to tie the knot often add to the stress. Instead of asking someone to get married, why don't they ask themselves, are they willing to offer practical help to single individuals when needed? This would be a true testament to the genuineness of their love for their neighbours as Jesus taught. It is important to remember that everyone's path to happiness and fulfilment looks different, and marriage is not the only way to achieve these goals.
Given my experiences, if I ever have a child, I plan to take a different approach. Instead of exposing them to love songs and romantic media, I will immerse them in content that tells of God and His Kingdom. I envision playing hymns, children's Bible songs, and Christian-oriented music more often to them, as well as showing them videos about God's creations. This exposure, I hope, will lay a strong foundation for their faith as they grow into adulthood. This foundation will help guide them in making decisions and facing challenges throughout their lives.
I would go as far as to enforce strict rules when my parents visit my family. I would forbid them from playing love songs or watching romantic entertainment while my children are around. Instead of television, my kids will find entertainment in books, outdoor exploration, and God-centred education. These are the kinds of experiences I believe children truly need, rather than the romantic love songs meant for adults. My children should be exposed to wholesome and enriching content that aligns with their age and values, not grown-up romantic or premium entertainment.
My ultimate hope is that by setting up this environment, my children will develop a deep interest in knowing God and a strong desire to build a relationship with Him. Romantic love songs are not the inheritance I wish to pass down. The greatest gift I can give my children is a deep and abiding faith in God. This way, whether they choose to marry a fellow believer or remain single, they will always remember to love the One who created them. In the end, it is not about restricting their exposure to romantic content, but rather guiding them towards what will truly fulfil their hearts and souls.
In reflecting on my journey and the influence of those early love songs, I see how they have shaped my understanding of romance and love. But as I grow older and wiser, I realise that there is something far more important to pass on to future generations. By focusing on God and His teachings, I hope to give my children a foundation that will support them through all stages of life, ensuring that their faith remains strong regardless of the paths they choose. I hope that they will continue to rely on their faith and find comfort and guidance in God's word.
I continue to treasure those love songs from my childhood, but I also recognise the need to guide my children towards a deeper, more meaningful inheritance. One that will not only enrich their lives but also prepare them for the challenges and blessings that lie ahead. In doing so, I hope to fulfil my role as a parent, nurturing their faith and their relationship with God, which is the most valuable legacy I can leave behind. I can only hope that they will carry with them throughout their lives. By instilling in them the importance of faith and spiritual growth, I believe I am equipping them with the tools they need to navigate life's ups and downs.
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